Thursday, July 20th, 2017
This is a story about how a dating app ruined my life. Okay, I’m a little bit exaggerating because my life is fine. But I noticed something different about myself when I started using a dating app. And I’m talking about just one dating app and it’s not Tinder. When I installed this app six months ago, I didn’t even know how to use it. I had to email the customer support with silly questions which I’m not going to reproduce here. Then I got it. Swipe right when you like him and swipe left when you don’t. Easy stuff.
At first, I was a little taken aback by how weird it feels to just reject someone based on their pictures and a few words they’ve written. I didn’t right swipe on any guy for the first month. Then slowly, I would right swipe on a few guys and went on the first date, second date, third date….and now, I’m exhausted. In the beginning, it was exciting to meet a new guy and had a good time and I did meet some really cool guys. But nothing substantial came from those dates. Now I dread about going out on a date…I didn’t feel as hopeful or optimistic as before. All I could think about was “Oh great, another date with some random guy who I will never see or hear from again.”
Some of the lessons I learned from using a dating app are:
1) Just because you’re talking to just one guy doesn’t mean that he’s only talking to YOU. He’s also talking to multiple girls at the same time and see which one he likes best. You should do the same.
2) When a guy says he’ll call you or he wants to see you again, don’t get too excited until he does what he promised.
3) Be prepared to be ghosted because it will happen all the time.
4) Do not have any expectations whatsoever on a date. That was my biggest mistake when I started going on dates. Just have fun and go home.
5) The reality is that most guys who use dating apps are looking for hook ups. Depressing for girls like me who are looking for a relationship but you can’t give up on love, right?
Using a dating app offers you a lot of options and that’s a good thing. But I also feel that it makes people unhappy because they’re never sure of what they want. It’s kind of like going to a grocery store to buy pasta sauce and here you are standing in front of hundreds of pasta brands and you have no idea which one you want. So you finally pick one because the packaging looks sexy and when you get home, you wish you pick a different one. Dating apps are kind of like picking a pasta sauce. Except you’re picking a real live human being. So be picky but be nice and don’t lose your faith in humanity in the process like I did. Okay, I’m exaggerating again but maybe not….